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Here I Am, Use Me

It’s almost been a week since racism was, unfortunately, highlighted on my university’s campus. See story here.

For the first few days, it didn’t bother me. I live in the South where just a few months ago, people were rallying in Walmart’s parking lot waving the Confederate flag. Racism and ignorance is something I’m used to, after all I don’t know half of my family because the color of my skin.

On Monday, my boss mentioned how this situation will most likely affect enrollment and I just shrugged it off–until Tuesday evening. I was out to dinner with some friends when I got an email from a prospective student. He told me that because of what had happened this past weekend on our campus, he was no longer considering attending our school. My heart broke. On Tuesday, our Admissions team met to talk about how we are going to discuss this event with prospective students and families. Then it hit me and I just started crying.

Satan is working extremely hard on this university (and in our world) to create division–and he’s succeeding.

This week has been overwhelming–having to face race relations head on, on top of everything else I’ve been dealing with. It’s not something I like to talk about because at the core of who I am it doesn’t make sense. I come from a bi-racial family and have never seen so much love for someone that is so different. Not only in appearance, but the way they talk, their intensity, their approach. My parents couldn’t be more different, but the one solid thing they have in common is their love for God.


God always has put a wrench in my plans for my life. Most of what has occurred in the last 8 years wasn’t on my list of things to do.

  • Attending Southern Adventist University wasn’t a part of my plans–at all
  • Studying in Argentina a year later wasn’t a part of the grand plan
  • Graduating a semester later wasn’t a part of my plan
  • Working at Southern was DEFINITELY not a part of my plan

But out of these things, God has placed incredible blessings in my life. Because I attended Southern, I met some incredible people. (And now all my Northern friends are moving down here.) Because I went to Argentina a year later, I had a life changing experience that led to doing research on the year and being published in a journal. Because I graduated a semester later, I had a tough year that really helped me learn who I was. Because of people at Southern, I’ve learned what my life calling is–and right now, that’s working with high school students.

I don’t know what God’s plan is for me when it comes to talking about and dealing with race on our campus–and that is incredibly overwhelming. But, I know because of how faithful He is, that it’s going to be something unexpected and incredible.

So here I am Lord, use me.


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